For a long time I have been concerned that there is a problem in NLP…

The Meta Model, the most powerful pattern that NLP has developed is poorly taught, poorly understood and poorly used.

Which is such a shame, as the Meta Model is the most powerful pattern in NLP. With it you can become a master communicator and your ability and understanding the rest of the model of NLP will grow exponentially.

Richard Bandler says that NLP is like a photocopy, the further you get from the original source the worse the quality becomes. This is no truer than in the Meta Model, where misunderstanding and misinterpretations have been handed down time after time.

There have been very few attempts to clarify the Meta Model or frame it in a more useful and comprehensible manner, and many NLP books and trainings regurgitate the same old stuff from outdated and outmoded source material.

This 29-page eBooklet is my attempt to undo this confusion and present the Meta Model in a way that is clear to understand and, most importantly, use correctly.

It is not intended to be a complete discussion on all the patterns, but an easy to understand primer to help you either learn it for the first time, revise what you know or undo any un-useful associations so that you can relearn the Meta Model in a more useful way.

It contains:

  • An understanding of the origins and theory of the Milton Model.
  • A history of the Meta Model – putting it in context.
  • How language creates reality.
  • An understanding of basic grammar.
  • Identifying generalisations, distortions and deletions
  • A list of the Classic Patterns in an accessible way.
  • Hints and tips to improve your skill at using the Meta Model.
  • Much more…

The usual price  is£15.99 (+ VAT). But if you buy BEFORE 31st August for the very special introductory price of £9.99

You can get it here.

“Disappointment takes adequate planning” – Richard Bandler

I was running a training last week, it was supposed to be a simple communication training, like the type I have run hundreds of times before, but the client kept changing their minds, changing the remit and asking for different things. It came to the point where I had no idea what I was meant to be doing, or what the client wanted (they probably didn’t know either).

I started running nightmare scenarios in my mind that I would deliver the wrong training to a hostile crowd and hardly slept the night before due to nerves (something that hasn’t happened to me for years).

I sorted out the nerves, but still didn’t know what to expect from the training. It ended up being fine, in fact it was good fun, with plenty of interaction and positive feedback.

The event went well, but my expectation of the event turned me into a bundle of nerves.

I can think of dozens of examples where this is the case in my life, from holidays to exams to work.

I have spent days beforehand with that churning in my stomach, running through all the worst possible scenarios and telling myself over and over again “I am really not looking forward to this, I really don’t want to do this” (which of course is the best possible way to get myself in a positive and useful state!), just for the actual event to be good fun or at worst no where near as bad as I was expecting!

Can you think, now, of some examples where this has happened to you?

do this thought experiment:

  1. Think of a time when you were not looking forward to an event, yet it actually went fine (or better than expected), notice the feelings of relief that it went OK.
  2. As you think about it, squeeze your thumb and forefinger together for a few seconds.
  3. Relax for a moment and squeeze your fingers together. Does it bring back the sense of relief? If not repeat steps 1 and 2 until it does.
  4. Think of something you aren’t looking forward to, that you are worrying about. Do you make a picture? Talk to yourself?
  5. If you make pictures of the all the catastrophic things that may go wrong, “push” it off into the distance while squeezing your thumb and forefinger. Does it change the feeling?
  6. If you talk to yourself, change the voice to someone you think is silly (Homer Simpson for example) while squeezing your thumb and forefinger. Does it change the feeling?
  7. Experiment with different combinations of the above to see what works for you.

In a running theme on this blog, here is another TV show I think NLPers should be watching:


It is currently showing here in the UK on Sky 2. Sadly, it was cancelled after just 13 episodes, but you can pick up a region 1 DVD of the series from Amazon (I don’t know if they intend to release it in other regions).

The whole show has similarities with the stories Richard Bandler tells about working with clients in the 1970’s. The lead character Dr Jack Gallagher, a psychiatrist, utilises seemingly unconventional techniques and processes such as re-enacting a court case, or hypnotising a patient (which seems to still be somewhat controversial in America) to help the patients deal with their presenting issues (or “curing them” if you want to use the medical model).

In last weeks episode on Sky 2, “Obsessively Yours” (episode 7) Jack Gallagher demonstrated beautifully how to utilise the Meta Model in a conversational, non invasive and, most importantly, none idiotic way to win over a colleague who disagreed with his analysis and suggested treatment.

A recommended watch, no matter what field you utilise NLP in.


In this episode, I share an exercise I learned from Aleister Crowley via Robert Anton Wilson. It will help you recognise all the random chance, coincidences and synchronicities that have got you where you are today. This will hopefully help undo unuseful or limiting beliefs and behaviours.

hack – verb. (Computers) to devise or modify (a computer program), usually skilfully.”

neuro-linguistic hacker – noun. (Psychology) a person capable of reprogramming [their own and] other peoples minds with verbal streams of data [specific patterns of language and behaviour]…” (Neil Stephenson – Snow Crash).

Inspired by Neil Stephenson’s book Snow Crash, I have recently started describing myself as a Neuro-Linguistic Hacker rather than a Neuro-Linguistic Programmer.

what’s the difference between a neuro-linguistic programming and neuro-linguistic hacking?

Richard Bandler (the co-creator of NLP) explains that NLP was specifically developed to study (model) the strategies (programmes) of others to help people learn new ways of doing things (re-programme ourselves). So for example, when Bandler was looking at ways to “cure” phobias, he found people who had cured their own phobias, learnt how they did it and then taught that to people with phobias. The result become formalised as the “Fast Phobia Cure”.

Neuro Linguistic Hackers uses the principles of NLP to “hack” their own brains, but rather than using someone else programmes, they create our own.

Neuro Linguistic Hackers are also adept at implanting a “thought virus” into the minds of other people.

Whereas NLP is remedial in nature (problem solving), NLH is generative (creating new, more effective ways of thinking, acting and communicating).

But NLH is more than that. Ideologically, NLH takes NLP back to its roots of exploration, fun and creativity, escaping from the overly formulaic and restrictive nature of the what NLP has become. It is a reaction to the attempts to overly mollycoddle and tie NLP into a formal framework, strangling it of it’s innovation and resourcefulness.

To learn more about Neuro Linguistic Hacking, how it can help you and how you can become a Neuro Linguistic Hacker please go to