What can Zen teach us about reality and do some Zen ideas intertwine and relate to neurology, NLP and related fields?

Case 29: Not the Wind, Not the Flag

The wind was flapping a temple flag, and two monks where having an argument about it.  One said, “the flag is moving.” The other said, “The wind is moving.” They argued back and forth but could not reach the truth.  The Sixth Patriarch said, “It is not the wind that moves, it is not the flag that moves; it is your mind that moves.”  The two monks were struck with awe.

In this videoblog, I beg you to check your references when teaching NLP and related fields. By not knowing your references you are opening yourself, and by association, NLP up to criticism and a lack of credibility.

To find out more about my take on NLP at the moment, read this recent interview here.

NLP VideoBlog Episode 18: My New NLP Training Marketing Strategy

In this episode I discuss my new NLP Training marketing strategy which is just promoting three things:

Do you want to be able to win ‘heads or tails’ every single time?
Do you want a nice shiny iPad?
Do you want to remember 20 or more things (in order) every single time?

There we go. If you do, then go here to sign up to my NLP Practitioner training (you will learn a lot more as well, I promise!)

In this NLP VideoBlog, I discuss 2 common misconceptions and over-generalisation that exist in NLP and how to avoid them. They are:??1. Considering someone as fixed in a certain modality, as “visual person” for example?2. Assuming all eye accessing cues are the same for all people.

In this videoblog I discuss what, to me, makes an excellent NLPer and give you my top resources to learn and practice the Sleight of Mouth patterns.

To get Doug O’Briens excellent book go to: www.sleightofmouth.org

So, why should you do (and not do) NLP training? Here I give you a few reasons why you may not consider NLP as the best thing to train in, but also some reasons why you may want to do an NLP training.

My sincere apologies for not having written a proper blog entry for so long.

Since the start of May my calendar has been chockablock full of things to do. Mainly training. Including my public NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner trainings as well as several in houses courses. In between I have only had the opportunity to work with my one to one clients, do some behind the scenes things (you may have noticed the ongoing facelift of this site) and just about keep up with my correspondence and that is about it!

It means something had to give and sadly that was this blog, my videoblogs and my social networking pages (my facebook page in particular is long overdue for a bit of a refresh). Now we are heading into the summer months (not that you would be able to tell by the weather) and, traditionally my quieter time when it comes to trainings, so I very much aim to get back on with this on a regular basis.


What’s Coming Up?

My upcoming trainings are selling out fast! If you want to book please do so as soon as possible to avoid disappointment.

27th July – NLP Practitioner Cardiff –  2 places left

14th September – Clinic Hypnotherapy Diploma 4 places left

5th October – NLP Practitioner Birmingham6 places left

26th October – Coaching for Change2 places left

2nd November – Master Practitioner Birmingham2 places left

16th November – NLP Practitioner Cardiff –  7 places left

In this NLP videoblog, I share a confession about my mistakes in attempting to build rapport in the hope it will help you avoid making them yourself!

Hello and Welcome to 2012.

The news is grim, with continued reports of the collapse of the worlds finances, talks of a returning recession, massive unemployment, companies going bust left right and centre… and here in the UK the New Year has started with sever storms (I hope that isn’t an omen)!

Now, more than ever, we need to carry out a revolution, a personal revolution in the way we think, act and behave. Ignore the glum and the doom and gloom and make 2012 your best year yet!

why do most people fail to achieve their goals?

One of the reasons I have discovered as to why people tend to fail in their resolutions is they look back at the previous year, convince themselves they didn’t achieve any of the resolutions they wanted to do that year and either give in in a big fat sulk or rush to try and do everything they wanted to do immediately, there by overwhelming themselves and giving up (in a big fat sulk).

If this sounds familiar then It is often a good idea to look back over, and assess the year just gone. But in a very specific way.

To achieve goals and outcomes you need to gather the appropriate resources, and to get the appropriate resources you need to ask the appropriate questions.

looking back

So before you start your plan of attack for this year ask yourself the following questions.

Lets start with something positive:

What went really well in 2011?

It can anything, no matter how small. Make a list. As you think about them, make the effort to really re-live the experience, pay attention to what you are seeing, hearing and in particular how you feel. Take a moment to be grateful and appreciate that you did them.

Ask yourself “how did I achieve these things that went really well, what did I think about and feel as I was working towards them?”

Now you have got yourself in a positive state and focused on some successes in 2011 you can approach the trickier area:

What didn’t go well in 2011? What were your biggest failures? Disappointments? Frustrations?

Write them all down and then ask yourself.

What did I learn from that experience?

Because, even if it was not the result you wanted, you still got a result or outcome and as we NLPer’s (sometimes annoyingly!) say “there is no failure, only feedback” so what can you learn from the results you got?

As you think about that, focus in on answering the following questions:

What do I need to do differently?

What do I need to do more of?

What do I need to stop doing altogether? Look at the goals or “resolutions” you did nothing with in 2011. Are they really what you want to achieve? One the most powerful lessons we can learn is to let go.

Once you have answers to all those questions you will have better resources to plan and achieve your goals for 2012. And be in a better frame of mind.

(I posted a video blog about this here, just the other day).

looking forward

Now, start thinking about the things you want to achieve in 2012 (bear in mind the “stop doing” list above!). List them in priority of what you want to achieve first. The biggest mistake people make with changes in their lives is to try and do everything all at once. Don’t. List them in priority order. You may not get round to even starting something on this list until much later in your year. That is fine.

When prioritising choose the following to do first:

  1. Look at the quick gains, what easy goals can you achieve that will set you up for succeeding (quitting is a dangerous habit).
  2. Look at the things that will make the biggest impact on your life right now.

If in doubt. Do less. Ask yourself what are the 3 key priorities. Can you get it down to just one? If you could only make one resolution this year, what would make the biggest impact?

Now you have your resolutions, ask this one simple question:

How will my life be better when I have achieved this goal/result?

Focus on what you see, hear and, most importantly, feel. If you cannot strongly imagine how these achievements will change your life (for the better) do you really need to do them? The secret here is to fall in love with the end result and make it so captivating for you that you are utterly compelled to take action. You don’t want it feel like it is a chore, or something you have to hype yourself up to do, it has to feel like something that you have to force yourself to stop doing. Make sense?

january coaching sale!

Do you need a little extra help in focusing on what you want to achieve?

In the spirit of New Years Resolutions and January Sales, I am offering a package of 6 one to one Skype coaching sessions for just £400 (usual price £600).

Click here to book your first session or call me on 07711 204013.

Wishing you a great 2012!


Well, well, well, it is only a few days now until Christmas and I am shutting up shop now until the New Year. So all there is left for me to do is wish you a very Merry Christmas and New Year and I will see you in 2012.


what’s coming up in 2012

  • BRAND NEW COURSE – Hypnotherapy Diploma (in Association with Balanced Approach).
  • NLP Practitioner Training – Now with iPAD!
  • Online courses and Premier Membership club.
  • Developing Your Dynamic Voice audio programme.
  • More advice for setting up your own coaching or therapy business, including web design.
  • A brand new blog (details coming very soon).
  • And finally (for now)… More videoblogs that I have horribly neglected in 2011!